Margo Howard on Oprah


O, Negative or Positive?

Not to beat a dead horse, but the “news” leads me back to Oprah again. Well, OK, it was Barbara Walters. We’re back to whether Oprah is or isn’t gay. She said – again – she was not; that being gay – if she were – would be perfectly fine.  And then she got all weepy at the mention of Gayle’s name. All I could think was: the mention of a close girlfriend of mine never reduced me to tears, unless she had died. As David Letterman said, “Methinks she doth protest too much.” (He said that years ago, and then Oprah didn’t talk to him for more than a decade and a half. Trust me, he’s not going there again.)

This discussion has been going on for quite a long time now. (We are a crazy country.) Gayle’s ex said, years ago, the O factor was too much for him, hence the divorce. My husband hasn’t said that about any of my girlfriends; has yours? This leaves the question of Stedman. He has been so relegated to background music that even Walters was surprised he was still in the picture. (I’m guessing O would have much preferred taking Gayle to the Kennedy Center Honors, but that was not to be.) Sted, referred to as a “20 year relationship” by O, has had some questions asked about his preferences, as well, so that does count as a wild card. There have been men, certainly, in O’s life and in her bed, but those situations didn’t work out too well.

I wish to be on record as saying I DON’T CARE if O bats for the other team. Everyone should live and be well. But please, can interviewers stop with this issue? If O and Gayle are an item, you’re never gonna hear it from them.

55 Responses so far.

  1. Honestly, is it any of our business anyway?

    Susan Gabriel
    author of Seeking Sara Summers

  2. avatar Linda Myers says:

    I have no doubt her love for Gayle is deep and they feel connected in some way, whether they ever chose to tie it up sexually would be their business, alone. I agree with you all the way Margo! Stedman though has always seemed like a provided for fixture in her life, I don’t think he is stupid enough to rock any boats or cares too.

  3. avatar Mr. Wow says:

    Oprah not only insisted she wasn’t a lesbian, but “not even a kind of lesbian.”  So, that wraps it up, yes?

    Actually, how tiresome of Barbara to even bring the subject up again.  More tiresome of Oprah to cry about it.  Surely at this point O realizes most people do think she’s gay.  Her popularity has not suffered.  I liked it better when she and Gayle were joking about it.

    For the record, I don’t know and I don’t care.  At least I think I don’t care.

    • avatar D C says:

      You said, “Surely at this point O realizes most people do think she’s gay.” 

      That really hit me because I realized I have NEVER considered whether or not Oprah is gay, because doesn’t matter.  And I don’t mean that in a bad way.  I mean it in the best way. She’s a person.  A very famous person who I think tries to live her life as privately as is possible in this incredibly bizarre time we live in with paparazzi hovering at every moment. I would not want that life for all the money in Oprah’s investment portfolio. 

    • avatar macwoof woof says:

      totally agree with you mr. wow

  4. avatar Katharine Gray says:

    I only saw a preview of the interview…it airs in full tonight doesn’t it?.  I thought this gay talk was all a Kathy Griffin joke.   I’ve had Oprah overload for about 10 years now…so I have not really followed all the gossip about her and Steadman and Gayle and Gayle’s ex-husband etc.

    However, I HAVE had tears come to my eyes when talking about my sisters.   I don’t believe Oprah has a biological sister but considers Gayle to be one.   So…I’m not going to use tears in her eyes as evidence that more is going on between them.  Just this week I had a 6 hour (no alcohol involved) lunch with a woman I have known since 1st grade.  We hadn’t seen each other for 8 years.   We had a few teary moments together as we talked about old friends and family, some of whom are no longer with us as well as lots of laughs.  I don’t find it odd that straight women can be very close to each other emotionally.

    But essentially…for the first time perhaps ever…I’m with Mr. Wow on this one.   Except I KNOW I don’t care.     

  5. avatar Chris Glass` says:

    I have female friends who mean as much to me as my husband. They have been there for me even when my siblings have not. I might get teary eyed if asked about them. I don’t see why it matters to the public if Oprah is gay or not. It doesn’t mean she is any less of a person. It is demeaning to question the sexuality of any individual, public figure or not, in a public forum. I see Oprah’s business ventures as a positive reason for avoiding marriage. They would complicate Stedman’s life immeasurably. I am with those who think this topic is tasteless.

  6. avatar Diane Shaw says:

    This isn’t a comment specifically about Oprah, but I agree with Margo, can these stupid interviews please end?  Granted, I don’t watch them as the previews are enough to last me a lifetime and that’s not a bash to Barbara Walters.  I like her, but geez Louise, enough already.  Gay or not?  Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.  

  7. avatar Steve Santay says:

    I think she “protests so much” because it’s nonstop speculation and quite rampant.  Of course she has to address it because it keeps getting asked!  No wonder…she’s probably tired of dealing with it.  It’s almost like you’re blaming her for addressing the problem again, when it’s Barbara Walters who brings it up!

    And I know people who have friendships that mean the world to them.  We don’t know their history.  We don’t know what they went through together.  It’s possible that the implication of something “underhanded” about her friendship with Gayle makes her so upset and it’s such a beautiful friendship that it WOULD bring tears to her eyes. 

    Alot of us under scrutiny might shed a tear thinking of a close friend or a family member and what they mean to us.  So, I disagree with your statement about her protesting too much.

    • avatar Joyce Manning says:

      What do u mean “she protest ro much!”. Say nothing and u lose, say something and u lose.    Give me a break!  Get a life.

  8. avatar Lila says:

    Is there no such thing as an intense but Platonic love of a friend?  Is there no such thing a finding a soul mate who is not a sexual attraction?
    If they were sisters, their friendship would not be assumed to be “sexual.”  Maybe people should try to think of them as sisters separated at birth, and just take O at her word.  I doubt she would “protest too much” if not for the constant repeat question, as if people think the answer will change.

  9. avatar Anne Whitacre says:

    I don’t particularly care what Oprah’s preference is, but she has to realize that she fuels the conversations because her relationship with Gayle is so prominent and public in her life.  She employs Gayle; she bought Gayle a house; Gayle has “her own room” in Oprah’s houses, they take cross country trips together; Oprah talks about her all the time.  (far more than she talks about Stedman).  They may be soul-mates, or lost sisters, or best friends, but I don’t think you’ll find another public personality who makes their friendship open to so much speculation. 
    Granted, the press beats this horse to death,but you don’t see nearly the press speculation about Stedman that you do about Gayle, and they pretty much leave him alone.  If Oprah wants her private life private, then  part of that is her responsibility, too.

    • avatar LandofLove says:

      I suspect that this is a no-win situation for Oprah. If she talks about Gayle, goes on trips with her, etc., people speculate. If she kept her friendship with Gayle in the background, the media would accuse her of having a secret “lover.” From what I understand, Oprah had a difficult childhood, perhaps has no siblings or relationships with family members, and has known Gayle since before Oprah became famous. Under those circumstances, it’s understandable that Oprah sees Gayle as a soulmate–in a way that’s completely different from her relationship with Stedman.

  10. avatar Baby Snooks says:

    The reality is Barbara Walters likes to toss in a surprise question in her interviews, usually a surprise only to the viewers, and so she decided to ask about the various rumors through the years and since this is one of the few that has been talked about outside of Kitty Kelley’s book, a definite “no-no” in an interview with Oprah, what was left?

    Someone really should explain to Oprah that just as beards with men are neon signs, beards with women are neon signs as well. Sometimes the “best friend” is the beard. And the neon sign.  Oprah and Gayle are Las Vegas. Add Stedman to the mix and the three consume enough energy to cause breakers to trip and plunge Las Vegas and parts of Nevada, Arizona and Southern California into the dark. 

    But all across America millions will watch the interview and go “see, she’s not gay like everyone says because Barbara Walters asked her and she said she wasn’t. ” No one ever lies to Barbara Walters after all.  

    But who knows. Maybe Oprah’s straight and Stedman just refuses to sign a pre-nup. And maybe some deranged African-American was riding around Beverly Hills at 12:30 am on his bicycle waiting for someone to pull up at a light so he could shoot them five times in order to rob them.  Maybe in everyone else’s world. But not in Baby Snook’s world.

    • avatar Mr. Wow says:

      Dear Baby…sometimes Barbara asks a question that elicits a suprising answer.  Years ago she pondered Elizabeth Taylor’s statement that she and Michael Jackson shared so much because “we both had abusive fathers.”  Nobody had ever picked up on that.  Barbara asked, and ET told—her father beat her.  More tellingly, she went on to say that years later:  “I sat on his lap and I forgave him.”

      Here, with Oprah, Walters is re-hashing an ancient rumor.   Who knows the truth?  Perhaps O and Gayle have an old-fashioned Victorian lady friendship that is intimate and affectionate, but not sexual?  
      By the way…Ronni Chasen?  Please, shot five times in the chest, by a man who had no such record for this sort of violence?  Maybe he did it, but…more to come.  And on a bicycle?

      • avatar Baby Snooks says:

        Of course he did it. The Beverly Hills Police Department says he did it. And of course it was random. Everyone insisted it was random so, well, it was random. And of course he was deranged. An African-American two-time loser worried about becoming a three-time loser and spending the rest of his life behind bars under the “three strikes law” obviously was deranged if he was riding his bicycle around Beverly Hills at 12:30 am with a gun in his pocket. In any case, case solved.

        Reminds one of Dorothy Kilgallen found dead in bed with an open book in her lap. With her reading glasses downstairs. 

        One thing I did find interesting is that after all the “she had no enemies” a friend slipped and told the Los Angeles Times she didn’t have that many enemies. Not that it matters at this point. The case is solved.

        I suppose it’s possible Barbara Walters occasionally slips a trick question in an interview. Occasionally.  Most of her interviews, to be honest, seem quite scripted which is why through the years I rarely watched them. 

        She could have at least asked about the rumors about Stedman. 

        • avatar Baby Snooks says:

          And I have to be politically correct about being politically incorrect and point out reality. An African-American would be out of place riding a bicycle in Beverly Hills at 12:30 pm. Definitely out of place at 12:30 am. Particularly one who plans to rob someone on his bicycle with a gun who is also worried about going back to prison for life if he’s caught with a gun.  Most likely a cop would stop him.  To see where he lived. And why he was riding his bicycle in Beverly Hills.  At 12:30 am most likely a cop would stop anyone. Particularly a minority. But definitely an African-American.  A cop would stop Oprah. Believing she and the usual entourage must be some sort of gang. 

          And no Beverly Hills is not racist. It is however primarily Caucasian and most of them are not riding around on bicycles. So anyone who is not Caucasian and riding a bicycle is going to draw attention. And probably get stopped by a cop.  Reality. 

          • avatar Paul Smith says:

            “And no, Beverly Hills is not racist”.  But they do racial profiling?

          • avatar Baby Snooks says:

            As noted below by Margo, they do people profiling. Some are profiled more than others.  It has nothing to do with race but rather the perception of  something or someone being “out of place” and they are usually very polite about it but nonetheless very firm about it and if you get stopped they want to know who you are, where you live, and if you don’t live in Beverly Hills, they want to know where you are going or where you have been.  Beverly Hills is one of the safest areas in the country to live and the “profiling” is one of the reasons. Which is why the bicycle story just seems a little, well, “out of place” to some.  And I realize it sounds offensive and probably made it moreso trying to make it less so but an African-American on a bicycle is “out of place” in Beverly Hills.  Less so in the business district. Moreso in the residential areas.  And he was in the middle of one of the most exclusive residential areas not only in Beverly Hills but in Los Angeles.  Supposedly on a bicycle. At 12:30 am. Something wrong with the picture. Something “out of place” in the picture.

            No doubt the mayor will read this and deny it. People know better. We are not engaging in a socio-political discussion here. We are talking about a murder that was “out of place” in terms of when and where it happened.

          • avatar Margo Howard says:

            Baby – this goes back quite a few years, but my former husband was stopped by a BH cop for WALKING.

          • avatar Baby Snooks says:

            I’m told it looks less suspicious if you’re walking a dog. Of course now that I’ve said that all the burglars will go out and buy a dog although I bet they will forget the pooper scoopers.

  11. avatar Lizzie R. says:

    I din’t especially like Oprah, and never watch her, but who cares about her sexuality? Seems like everybody does, and no matter what she says or doesn’t say everybody has already made up their minds re this. The sex lives of celebrities loom large in the minds of the ‘little people”…”is he or she, or isn’t he or she?” Most people don’t give a hoot, but it sure is important to the many. Oprah isn’t “in your face” about her personal life, but she is such a major celebrity this can’t avoid being a big issue which will never end until she finally marries a man, and even then it still won’t stop, I’m sure.

  12. avatar Tee Zee says:

    O who cares.  I hope this is Barbara Walters last, I’m just so tired of the endless hype.  The who’s she gonna make cry interview.  I will vote with my remote and not watch, maybe read a book instead.

    • avatar Deeliteful says:

      Thank you, Tee Zee.  Ever since Ms. Walters asked Katherine Hepburn what kind of tree she would compare herself to, I have avoided watching anything that involves Ms. Walters. 

      • avatar Baby Snooks says:

        “What tree would you be?” One of those trick questions she occasionally tosses in.  At least one of the ones that remain in the final edit I suppose. One of the most vapid questions ever asked of anyone. 

        Katharine Hepburn of course replied “an oak.”  Katherine Hepburn reportedly later added “because I would get to drop acorns on people who displeased me as they passed beneath.”  Not sure if anyone pursued whom she might drop acorns on. But most likely the answer would have been vapid interviewers asking vapid questions. 

        • avatar june sechowski says:

          Barbara never asked Katherine that question.  The tree question is one of those misreported items that take on a life of their own.  Barbara has in the past corrected the mistaken public rememberance, but as these legends go, it can not be shaken.   Video clips confirm Hepburn initiated the discussion by saying that she would like to be a tree, and Walters merely followed up with the question, “What kind of a tree?”[  I must side on the side of girl power, Barbara deserves our support.

          I find as I get a little older, I do get more sentimental and can be reduced to tears at surprising times.  My understanding is that Oprah realized that she had never told her best friend the things that Barbara was drawing out.  And our oldest friends share so much with us that they should be told how we feel.

          • avatar Baby Snooks says:

            I wouldn’t know because I didn’t watch.  I think I have watched once or twice.  One interview with Elizabeth Taylor.  I may have watched another one.  I am not into Barbara Walters as they say. Or into Orah either. There is something fake about them both.

            And something hidden. Primarily their fangs.

  13. avatar Adla Coure says:

    Looking at it from a different perspective – it’s funny how Americans seem to be more concerned or interested in trying to find out her sexuality. I haven’t seen an article yet (as she is in Australia now, where I live) about her sexuality. Rather, the media has chosen to focus on the great time that she and her American audience whom she bought to Australia are having. I don’t understand why people get so caught up about sexuality. Will it change who she is when she wakes up tomorrow? Will it have any affect on her charity work? her television projects? the kind of person that she is? I’d say not.

    • avatar Mr. Wow says:

      Dear Alda…not a damn thing should change, should it turn out that Oprah is not entirely heterosexual.  But.. here in the good old U.S. of A  we remain Puritans, despite reality TV and R-rated movies. 

      We still like to giggle behind our hands, like schoolgirls, over sex. 

      • avatar Paul Smith says:

        We do more than giggle: “I Kissed A Girl” catapulted a mediocre talent into a star.  But mind you: It was a girl kissing a girl.  No points lost, especially when she went off and married a Brit.  Oprah is past the pont of interest; she strikes many as almost sexless.

  14. avatar Briana Baran says:

    I am not, and never have been a fan of Oprah in her celebrity, super-star, talk-show hostess incarnation. I first watched her when I was at home with my newborn son, and recovering from an emergency c-section. I always doubted the reality of her sincerity, and wondered at the sort of “guests” she would bring to the light (from under very dank and moldy rocks, I suspected). Better than Springer? Less obstreperous does not necessarily equate to better. I stopped watching all of that drek as soon as I got the use of my arm (a whole ‘nother story) back, and I could hold very large baby, and read simultaneously.
    I can’t quite agree with her alleged subtlety regarding her private life. She’s really all too out there, and she does babble on endlessly about Gayle (which I only gather from that which is referred to as news, which is actually only celebrity worship), and when O Magazine (first time I picked that up I thought it was something entirely different) is all that is available for a long doctor’s office wait. Oprah lives large, obviously craves and demands attention, tends toward drama and the histrionic…and while she has done some very generous things…in Africa…in my personal opinion this is over-shadowed by the enormous damage she has “innocently” caused with her promotion of imbeciles and snake-oil sales-women on her show. Pertussis and measles are now certified epidemic in parts of California. Parents refusing to vaccinate…and who allowed someone to present this insanity to millions of loyal viewers, only providing a barely heard disclaimer after the bomb had been dropped? Why, who indeed!
    However, I truly don’t give a damn about her sexuality, who she beds down with or doesn’t, beards, or any of that at all. I don’t care if my son’s teachers are gay or lesbian, nor his coaches, or the parents of his best friends. I am bisexual, and all of my friends know this, and they are still my friends, come hell or high water. That part of Oprah’s life has no significance to anyone but Oprah and those with whom she is intimate. If she is a lesbian, and she is in denial after so many years, I think that this is sad, and I wonder why she chooses to deny it, but only in the sense that it makes a curious study in human nature. It isn’t important to my opinion of her, and it wouldn’t make a difference. I am not titillated by purient knowledge of others, and discovering that some celebrity is gay or lesbian should barely make a ripple in the waters of the oceans of celebutard worship these days for anyone.
    As for Barbara Walters, o please, woman just go to bed. Enough already. Whatever tricksy edge she thought she once had is probably long gone (I don’t watch celebutard interviews either…because everybody lies, and emotes, and blahblahdeblah). Good grief, if she thinks asking Oprah, with bated breath, “Are you really a lesbian?”, is a surprise question for either Ms. Winfrey or her viewing audience, it really is time for her to hang up her hat.
    Of course, millions of sycophants will be outraged that mean Ms. Walters made Oprah cry (I suspect that those may have been crocodile tears. Oprah’s too professional, and has been in the game far too long to let the waterworks dribble over that question. Although she does seem to have problems taking her own advice about big-girl-panties…). I am a cynic, true, but people being cruel, and taking Oprah to task seems to only raise her ratings.
    As suggested, the questions are most likely planned in advance. Nicely done, then people, just brilliant…

  15. avatar b tabar says:

    Enough about Oprah and Barbara Walters already.  I don’t watch either.  I don’t trust either.  Oprah’s sexuality is Oprah’s business and not mine.  Some people in this world can have relationships that are deep sexless friendships.  It can happen.  I have no idea what the real relationship is between Gayle and Oprah and don’t care.  It perturbs me that some people think that sex has to be part of all and any relationships a person has.  I agree with you, Margo.  Let it go and move on is what I say.

  16. avatar Belinda Joy says:

    How often do we hear of your husband, Margo?
    And speaking of Stedman, what exactly is it you expect to hear from him? He is living a VERY full and successful life. I take it you don’t watch the show, because if you did you would find that Oprah talks about Stedman CONSTANTLY. When she speaks of vacations, dinners, night’s out, shopping, her conversations always begin with “Stedman and I……)
    He is not a boy toy. He is a grown man who has his own career and own money who happens to be dating one of America’s most affluent women, no more, no less. Should he be draped across her body at every turn?
    Oprah has said repeatedly that she is not a Lesbian. That is honest and I take her at her word. Because of anyone on the planet, if they are going to trumpet their sexual identity it would be Oprah. She is not doing as other celebrities are that (IMO) are hiding their sexuality by answering the question “Are you Gay?” with “I prefer not to discuss my personal life” No, to the contrary she is forthright and direct in saying she is straight.
    Funny how women like yourself who look for reasons to dislike her and pick her apart, can’t appreciate the love of a best friend. A deep love of a best friend.
    When I heard Oprah explain to Barbara Walters that Gayle King is like a mother, sister, best friend, etc. etc. etc. with tears in her eyes, and how she has never met anyone who is as good a person as she is….you may not have “got it” but I sure did.
    Imagine if you will, that you were raised in abject poverty, no mother. Sexually abused and raped by males in your life. And because of that abuse and low self esteem you grew up with a distorted sense of self. Became promiscuous and slept around, looking for validation from any and everyone.
    Lo and behold you meet a female that accepts you for who you are. You become friends, confidantes on a deep level.  A friend who is honest with you when others are not. One that calls you out on your s*%t and no matter how many “yes men and women” surrounding you, you can always be sure she won’t allow your head to swell. One that brings you into her family, husband and kids and makes you feel at home and as one. When you are scared, insecure and unsure of this or that in life, she comforts and supports you unconditionally.
    We should all be so lucky to have a friend like that Margo. But especially when we come from and have lived through all the Oprah has. You don’t watch the show so you don’t know, but Oprah truly is every woman. She is honest about her shortcomings and low self esteem issues. What she says resonates with millions of women because aspects to who she is and what she struggles with, most of us share in.
    Who hasn’t struggled with weight issues, or feeling “less than” others. Even with more money than she can spend in a lifetime, she still has abandonment issues. When her dog died, she grieved the same as any other woman in the world who loves their pet as if it were a child. She admits to loving the fact she can be generous, but also has shared she has issues with being taken advantage of.
    All of this may be issues beyond what the Great Margo Howard has dealt with, but for most women they are real and tangible issues.
    So you may claim to be fed up with the debate about whether she is straight or not, but it is glaringly apparent you have your doubts. Again I remind you, she isn’t avoiding answering the question about her sexuality nor is Stedman. Early on the rumors were he was Gay, not because he had been rumored to be with another man, but more so because people couldn’t believe a tall, handsome, trim, successful Black man would want to date (and God forbid) have sex with a 220 pound woman. So surely the only reason any one would want to be with her would be because of her money. Surely he was nothing more than a gigolo……
    You have admitted in the past you don’t care for Oprah, and the reasons you gave are incredibly superficial. But then again, there are countless celebrities mentioned on the threads of the wowowow site that I despise for all the same superficial reasons. So I guess this post is no different than what countless others have posted in response to my negative posts, this is my defense of a woman I admire and respect.
    Lastly Margo, I appreciate that you are known for your no nonsense, shoot straight from the hip, persona, but I must tell you, given your age (and I don’t mean that as a slam) one would think that you would have learned by now what happens early in our lives affects who we become later in life to some extent. From Liza Minnelli to Michael Jackson, and hundreds of thousands of other celebrities who had troublesome childhoods, low self esteem can play havoc on who you are as an adult, regardless of the money in your bank account.
    Oprah may not be your cup of tea because you think she is “full of herself” but she has shown time and time again nothing is farther from the truth. As she has admitted, there are very few in her life that see her at her true and most vulnerable side and two of those people are Stedman and Gayle. It’s too bad you have never loved anyone in your life as deeply and profoundly as Oprah has for her good friend, I know I have. And yes, I have cried at the mere thought of being blessed with someone so special and important in my life.
    And I assure you I am 100% strictly-dickly.

    • avatar Baby Snooks says:

      No offense but since you brought it all up my personal impression of all of it is that all of it is what Oprah created along the way and none of it has any basis in fact or reality.   Gayle is like the mother she never had? Excuse me but she has a mother. Keeps her muzzled along with the rest of her family so they won’t spoil the show.  She’s a fraud. As are the majority of her guests whom she promotes inbetween the celebrities.

      So maybe she’s not lovers with Gayle. She doesn’t appear to be lovers with Stedman either. Both seem to be props if you want to be honest.  Like everyone else who has a role on “The Oprah Show.” 

      I think Margo’s point is everyone is tired of Oprah. Period. Quite a few are tired of Barbara Walters as well. 

      • avatar Briana Baran says:

        Ah, well, Baby, there are some who would defend Oprah if she opened up on her audience with a Mach 10, then said it was for their own good according to the wisdom of Winfrey. I do believe that she has managed to garner unto herself the same sort of charisma (which eludes this particular woman) as Pat Robinson…and Sarah Palin. All of them are mythic fabrications, and I personally wouldn’t trust a word that dripped from between their lips…but some must have their idols.
        And, for the record, I must say that I just simply adore the way that Oprah’s sycophants presume to know so much about how all women feel, as well as what all women have and have not endured. Brilliant. I do so wish I had that degree of telepathic and clairvoyant ability.
        Because I must avow that I do not hold forth on national television with my repeated attacks of angst, chest-beating, mea-culpas and drama over events that are simply part of life, and blow them into performances of epic dimensions. Pets die, and we grieve…quietly. Weight is lost and gained, and we don’t make ludicrous excuses (and o yes honey, I have been there too many times), we do something about it (that doesn’t involve lying about miracle cures and mysticism when all that was required is the mundanity of thyroid adjustment). Childhood is lost in agony, abuse, lost of trust, rape, drugs and nihilism…most of us cope in silence and become better people…we don’t broadcast our torment as an excuse for our continued excesses at an age, and in a position, at which we should well know better.
        Also, anyone who would dare to be so insulting as to boldly state that Margo Howard, or anyone, has obviously never known a love as deep, abiding, heartfelt and all encompassing as Oprah (whom she does not know personally anymore than she knows Ms. Howard, or any of the rest of us), is obviously an arrogant, childish, moronic fool. How can one claim to know the heart of a soul whom she has never met? Especially when comparing them to a huckster like Oprah Winfrey, whose words never quite are true to pitch, and who always makes me wonder whether she carries a small but powerful onion in her sleeve to provoke those oh, so convenient bouts of emotive weeping.
        Well, there is always someone, and it always the same someone on this website. How nice to be able to anticipate a response! I’m certain that Oprah could kick this person’s…mmm…ah…I was going to say puppy, but I think she dislikes small furry things as well as children…how about familiar…and she would still hold drop her coat in a puddle so as to prevent Ms. Winfrey from soiling her feet. We all have to be somewhere.

        • avatar Baby Snooks says:

          I grew up with two of the “gurus” and all I can say is they both had fabulous publicists. I’ll leave that at that.   

    • avatar HauntedLady says:

      For the record, Oprah is most definitely NOT every woman. I’m a woman and she’s nothing like me and doesn’t resonate with me at all. There’s something about her that doesn’t ring true so I generally avoid things involving her as much as I can.
      And, really, one’s sex life is personal and it’s just plain rude to inquire about it.

  17. avatar Maggie W says:

    I don’t give a flying fig about Oprah’s sexual preferences. Or anyone else’s for that matter. I can count how many times I’ve seen her show on one hand. Nothing against Oprah; I’m not much a daytime TV person .  Oprah has shared part of her ample fortune with young people in need not only in this country but abroad.  I know nothing of a Stedman or a Gayle… but if they are good , loving pals of a person who is mega charitable, then how nice that all three found and love one another… and on a level and with a depth that most people cannot understand.  That would include Barbara Walters.

    I have a Gayle in my life. I grew up in a loving home but with brothers.  My Gayle and I have known each other for since grade school.  When we do see each other, we hug.  When leaving a restaurant, we often hold hands and walk close to one another, giggling like lovers might. We did this in grade school during recess. We do love each other. No doubt, she is  a huge part of my world.  Between us, we have 7 children; we are also still in love with our husbands after all these years.  But, if someone wants to read something more into our friendship, I don’t gave a rat’s furry…..and neither does my Gayle.

    • avatar Linda Myers says:

      The more this world tends to think of itself as open and evolving, at times I feel as if people now are viewed as orientation first, all else follows. I have had a friend for the last decade who seems like when I met her, I was meeting a long lost person in my life. She knows me better at times than I know myself. I know when she is hurting before hearing about it and vice versa. Feeling those stings that do make you cry when they touch a part of yourself, you don’t even realize. She is married, I am not. Connections are not always about sexual, sometimes you just have people in your life who center you in a way through friendship not found in relationships centered in a sexual relationship. There can be two roads widely misunderstood in who is important in your life. Whether Oprah is or isn’t or anybody else for that matter seems to consume people’s thoughts and create judgments even in a passing glance of others. If that is how this world has progressed, then thinking needs to rise back up above the shoulders in how we react and see others. 🙂

      • avatar Baby Snooks says:

        I am getting older, may drop dead sooner than later although of course since so many wish I would I probably won’t just to spite them, and have not mellowed with age or the thought of mortality and so since I’ve already been “politically incorrect” already I will be “politically incorrect” again. 

        My personal belief about this “menage-a-trois” is that it is a sham to avoid having to deal with the “cultural bias” that exists in the “mainstream” African-American community which absolutely rejects homosexuality and so would reject her as it has so many others who were honest about their lives and regretted it. 

        But I honestly don’t think she fears the rejection so much as the possible impact on the empire. I don’t think, regardless of what is or is not behind the facade so to speak, that anyone in her life is anything more than a prop for “The Oprah Show.” 

  18. avatar Karleen S says:

    I’ve been done with Oprah for a long time.  It doesn’t matter if anyone is gay or straight, just whether they blip the “tedium” radar.  Oh, the wonderful Oprah who gives things away so generously (that were either donated to her for the publicity or why writes off on her income tax, and for which the recipient have to pay taxes).

  19. avatar Miss Lee says:

    I have a girl friend who I am far closer to than anyone in my family or anyone else in the world.  She is the only person with whom I can be completely honest and I treasure her.  We have supported eachother through sickness, divorces, the death of parents and many other of life’s difficulties.  When we lived in the same city, people often assumed that we were a lesbian couple.  My ex-husband even accused us of being gay.  I do love her but I am not sexually attracted to her, or any woman for that matter.  If you were to push me and get me talking about all the times she has been there for me and I for her, I would and have teared up. I really think that it is really unfortunate that close relationships between women who are not related by blood or marriage are now suspect and subject to rumor.  I think it says much more about the people spreading the rumors than the women involved.

  20. avatar Jon Schweizer says:

    I know it’s nobody’s business whether Oprah is gay or not (and I don’t think she is).  But hypothetically, if she were in a relationship with Gayle, I have to say that I’d hope that she would publicly own up to it.  Not because I want her to flaunt her sexuality (an accusation, BTW, that never seems to get thrown at straight celebs no matter how much they dish about their love lives).  But because it would help further acceptance to have an uber-celebrity like Oprah come out.  And I’m speaking as someone who wishes she’d hurry up and retire already.

  21. avatar elaine s says:

    It’s possible she is gay, and although today it is acceptable, when she was young, it wasn’t.  She may have felt she had to be less than honest for so long that she has no idea now how to fix it.  The whole interview seemed staged, to me.  It was interesting how Walters asked about her mother; showed a picture of O and her mother; then O said Gayle was “the mother she never had”.  Like most on TV, O is no longer relevant.  It was interesting to hear her slam TV itself, which has made her what she is, and say she needs to create a new network because most available TV sucks.  She is certainly a part of that.  Walters is way past being relevant.  On “The View”, she sometimes seems as if she isn’t sure what is going on at all.  I think she is close to 80.  It’s time to retire before she is pushed out.  Back to O, as far as her sexuality goes, the  proof to me of her lack of relevance in today’s world is best shown by the fact that she thinks anyone gives a good God damn about whether or not she is gay or straight. 

  22. avatar Cindy Marek says:

    Guess I’m out of the loop, because I didn’t know O’s sexuality was in question regarding lesbianism until yesterday (Yahoo or CNN headline). Figured she and Gayle were just friends (maybe they are). I don’t follow any celebs closely, and particularly not Oprah; haven’t watched a show of hers in years. What Margo mentions does sound a bit “iffy”; I don’t cry over gal pals either, and none of their husbands feel threatened by me. {shrugs}

  23. avatar Rain says:

    IMHO Oprah and Gayle seem to be having a lifelong emotional affair.

  24. avatar Pdr de says:

    I have several friends and a sister with whom I’m very close – I love them dearly, enjoy their company and feel blessed that they love me too.  BUT…not one of us is physically, sexually attracted to the other.  We hug each other hello and goodbye, we love spending time together, we talk on the phone and e-mail one another and if one of them was in trouble, I’d be there in a hot minute as they have been for me over the years.  Only women are capable of having wonderful, warm, loving, sharing relationships that enhance their lives and give them a sense of well being; relationships that are spontaneous with no strings attached.  I’ve said it in this column before, I feel blessed to have such special women in my life and yes, they color it with rainbow hues.

    Oprah had a very difficult childhood – Gayle is a very warm, loving, beautiful soul – they have a unique relationship – the kind where if you could pick your sister, it would be this person.  Oprah probably can count the people she absolutely trusts on less than one hand – Gayle and Steadman are clearly two people who enhance her life and with whom she can be herself. 

    It’s nobody’s darn business if they’re gay or not and frankly, I’d be astonished if they were.  They love each other, trust each other, enjoy one another’s company, turn to each other when there are problems and love going places together.  Since has that been an indication they’re gay?  Leave them alone for Pete’s sake!

    Worry about the fact this country is going down the tubes.  Worry about the homeless, particularly those in the Midwest in this very bitter cold winter.  Worry about whether or not you’re going to lose your job or won’t be able to find a job.  Do away with the trivalizing in your lives and start getting serious about what you can do to make life better for the people around you. 

  25. avatar Joyce Manning says:

    Listen at this: I believe O was crying because she just can’t get u people to believe her.   Sometimes it just an emotional breakdown, and yes it was when asked about Gayle. Isn’t that O biggest and dearest friend, “the one she’s having an so call lesian affair! with.” Hell, I cry too and you idoits want let it go!!!! Time and time again!!!!

    Sherman Oaks, Ca.

  26. avatar Harriet Shoebridge says:

    Barbara Wa-Wa … says it all … an interview incomplete without the interviewee reduced to tears.  See the scab and start pulling on it … just not nice.

  27. avatar Briana Baran says:

    Regarding any interviews with Oprah, it has been said many times by those professionally close to her that all questions asked during said interviews are reviewed by Oprah and/or her staff, and only those which are approved are allowed to be asked…no matter who is asking them. I seriously doubt that the question of Oprah’s sexual orientation being presented as an option would come as a surprise to her…it is a standard in any Oprah interview, and I would wager that it was deemed perfectly acceptable, and that she was fully prepared for it.
    Remember, Oprah herself is a media personality who has made her own dubious fame by asking (allegedly) tough, shock (schlock) questions…especially of celebrities whose ideologies, platforms and ideas she disagrees with, or finds offensive (except Sarah Palin, with whom she played the soft-shoe dance). This is her profession and her pride, and she has been doing it, and garnered the idolization of millions from it. For her to be suddenly overcome by emotion (emoting?) and break down in tears over the oft repeated query as to whether or not she and Gayle are lovers does not make any sense, or ring true in any way. Especially when the question came from the o-so predictable Barbara Walters. Oprah is old enough, and experienced enough, to know perfectly well Ms. Walters’ interview patterns and habits. To claim surprise, and emotional wounding in this situation is ridiculous.
    There shouldn’t even be a ghost of a scar on Oprah regarding her and Gayle after all of these years of ludicrous questions (why she emotes, and loses her hair instead of just saying, “It really isn’t any of your business” is just another indicator of her penchant for drama, and creating an alternative to the solar system that revolves around Oprah’s self-created astral object rather than our sun). And for the record, there are women and men whom I do love, and have loved deeply. I would cry if one of them became deceased…but if someone suggested that one of my dearly loved female friends and I were having a secret lesbian relationship, I would laugh in her face. And I am bisexual. But I have had friends of both sexes in whom I had not the slightest iota of sexual interest, nor did they in me, and yet our love was very fierce, protective and powerful. I know what Platonic friendship is. If someone actually wounded one of them, I wouldn’t weep and moan. I would act. But suggesting that our relationship was other than its actual nature? O, please.
    My dears, given all of my wounds, scars, mental illnesses, miserable, abusive childhood. alcoholism, drug addictions, and even a mother who doesn’t love me (poor little old me)…I think at this point I could hold up my head, look that person in the eye, and say, “Why do you even care? Is your own life that empty?”.

  28. avatar V B says:

    oh for god sakes

    the woman said she is not gay

    can we move on?

    Of all the things Oprah cries about, a life long friendship is probably the best…


    its the menopause stupid