Liz Smith: Stars to the Media — "We Want to Be Alone" (Now That We Are Oscar Nominees!)

No questions, please!

And more from our Gossip Girl: Brad and Angie — are they “Distant?” …. anticipating “The Borgias” 

“THE PUBLIC have an insatiable curiosity to know everything, except what is worth knowing,” said Oscar Wilde.

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EVERY SINGLE major celebrity in the Oscar sweepstakes has now had a change of heart.

“I can’t do an interview with you,” they say to the biggest of the big — “I’m sorry. I like you. But I am over-exposed!” Some of what you you’re seeing the VIP stars do on TV and in print was done days and weeks ago even, when they were hustling to be nominated.

When I saw Meryl Streep doing Jimmy Fallon’s show, he asked her the last time she’d been drunk and she responded merrily, “Last night!” I knew that only hours later the one and only Ms. Streep would be saying — “No, no more; I’m OVEREXPOSED.” Mr. Clooney follows suit.

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MADONNA IS not up for an Oscar, but she is still out there plugging her “W.E.” movie and her upcoming Super Bowl appearance.

She has yet to announce she is over-exposed. I caught her with Jay Leno the other night and she was girlishly nervous. It was appealing. One way or another, it is difficult to find TV interviews with Madonna where she totally relaxes.

This woman needs a good stiff drink before she does the chat-show thing. She did tell Leno that no matter what she does onstage at the Super Bowl, there will be no “nipple slippage.”

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THE FIRST images of Daniel Craig as 007 in “Skyfall” are being released. Fans are relieved. Even with bits of gossip about the filming coming out, nobody was satisfied that there would ever be a 23rd Bond movie until they saw Mr. Craig in character. Daniel is not all duded up, wearing a tux and casually fondling a gun and ordering a martini.

Craig’s Bond is grizzlier, rougher, meaner — an even more menacing killing machine than previous 007’s. The new photos reflect this.

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NOW THAT there is an entire new magazine devoted exclusively to reality TV creatures — titled, in fact, Reality — maybe these non-celebs will be weaned off the covers of the other glossies like InTouch and UsWeekly and be chiefly covered by Reality. These publications function as today’s version of fan magazines, and it would be nice to see them devote their silliness to r-e-a-l-l-y big stars only.

InTouch now has a two-page spread on their fave star couple — and they are real stars, at least — Brad and Angie. It is titled “7-Year Itch” and states that the pair are clearly losing interest in one another. To prove it, the magazine uses photos, showing them at the beginning and now. The shots that are supposed to represent how they are fading are hilarious: If they are standing slightly apart, they are “Distant.” If neither is smiling, they are “Disinterested.” (Don’t they mean “Uninterested?”) There’s also one — from the recent Golden Globes — that is captioned “Out of Step.” I didn’t get that at all. Except that Brad was using a cane, because of an injury to his leg.

I guess the people who write this stuff didn’t bother to watch the GG’s. When Miss Jolie glided onstage in her stunning white and red gown, Brad beamed with pleasure and pride from his seat.

And I guess the editors of InTouch missed Brad’s recent statement about eventually marrying. “I don’t think we can avoid it.” Hardly the words of a restless, unhappy man.

But I don’t want to come down too hard on fiction writers. Go back and look at any fan magazine cover from the late 1950s onward. Same crazy made-up stuff. There is nothing new under the sunlamp.

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I WAS reminded about how eagerly I am awaiting the return of Showtime’s deliciously decadent “The Borgias,” after I saw an advertisement for a new exhibition at the Metropolitan Museum of Art.

The show is called “The Renaissance Portrait: From Donatello to Bellini.” They use a wonderful example to promote the exhibition in the ad — Antonio del Pollaiuolo’s “Portrait of a Lady.” (In those days, everything was called “Portrait of a Lady.”) I’m sure even Lucrezia Borgia had a few of those hanging around.

I know Lucrezia got a bad rap, and probably wasn’t the great poisoner of legend. But with a family name like Borgia, and all those people dropping dead after dinner, well, that’s how gossip starts.

The show at the Met runs through March 18th. And “The Borgias” with Jeremy Irons as the worldly Pope Alexander returns to television on April 8th.

These cable shows make you wait and wait for your satisfaction!

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ENDQUOUTE: “I’m not good at this part of it — I’m quite shy.” That’s Rooney Mara, the Oscar-nominated “Girl With the Dragon Tattoo.” There’s nothing wrong with that, Miss Mara. In fact, I’ve read recently that introverts are making a comeback!

10 Responses so far.

  1. avatar Briana Baran says:

    Miss Liz, I adore you, and you are probably the best of the “Celebutard Gossip Garbage” columnists out there (and the only one I ever bother to read…because you occasionally drop tidbits about actually *interesting* people).

    But…Madonna. Again. Please, Liz, please, I beg of you, no more. Perhaps the hysteria will be quelled by whatever she manages at the Super Bowl? At least I have Ms. Ciccone’s guarantee (I rank that right up there with “the check is in the mail”, and “We’re from the government, and we’re here to help”) that there won’t be a wardrobe malfunction. Of course, given her costuming on her last tour…is that necessarily a good thing?

    And Angelina and Brad. Who apparently are or aren’t growing distant. And are or aren’t planning to produce more children (I got that from a friend…and was nearly compelled to begin chanting “Lalalalala…I can’t HEAR you!” with my hands pressed firmly over my ears.

    There are so many celebrities who lead fascinating lives…why MUST we constantly churn on and on about the same dull, never-changing, in no way challenging *stars*? It reminds me of slow waves on Lake Erie during the ’70’s. Fresh waters and a clean landscape would be so refreshing.

  2. avatar Howard says:

    Let me be one of the first to wish Ms. Liz Smith the very happiest of birthday greetings and all best wishes for a healthy and splendid year to come!!

  3. avatar Dab-a- do says:

    Just read in the New York Social Diary that today is your birthday, Ms. Liz. Wishing you a very happy birthday and many more!

  4. avatar Rho says:

    Happy Birthday, Liz. Have a wonderful day.

  5. avatar Deirdre Cerasa says:

    Happy Birthday, Liz!

  6. avatar Baby Snooks says:

    Happy Birthday to my other favorite Gregarious Aquarius. Wonder if Liz remembers who the other one was.

  7. avatar howard green says:

    Have yourself a merry little birthday. Enjoy!

  8. avatar Roxanna Chapman says:

    Happy Birthday xxoo, Roxy

  9. avatar Ellen Apgar says:

    A very happy, healthy birthday to Ms. Liz!

  10. avatar jeremyten says:

    happy birthday to you and elaine